Why is misappropriation of attraction dangerous?
Choosing the wrong person.
Infidelity
Divorce
As individuals many of us spend a lot of time looking for the "right" person. However, love itself isn't an concept to define. Some people define love as a sort of feeling you get, to be specific, your heart starts pounding, you might start feeling warm, and short of breath. Unfortunately these are also symptoms of an adrenaline rush. So, boys and girls if this is how we think attraction works all we need to do is take someone we like tandem bungee jumping and you're set for life! Wrong! Because it is also common knowledge that adrenaline rushes fade away. Therefore, it is easy for us as individuals to "occasionally" misappropriate our feelings of attraction. Sometimes, even when we are already in a committed relationship.
Misappropriation of attraction is, in my opinion what makes choosing the "right" person so difficult. Misunderstanding our emotions can lead to us to individuals that are not the good for us. The idea of finding the right person generally comes with the stipulation that they make us happy. While finding someone who makes us happy it is imperative that we consider the long term consequences of a momentary joy. We have to self-evaluate our own feelings and try to understand ourselves. Self-awareness is important in a relationship. You have to be aware of your needs in a relationship and you have to be aware of whether those needs are being met or not; before you've made a more permanent decision.
Consequences for misappropriating feelings after marriage can have greater consequences overall. It is easy to misappropriate feelings when one does not feel their needs are being met in a committed relationship. This can cause individuals to look elsewhere even subconsciously and lead to the misappropriation of feelings. Which can lead to a more physical relationship outside of a marriage. Infidelity in a marriage easily becomes a serious issue for friction and conflict in a marriage. This is detrimental to a relationship straining everyone including children if the couple has children and eventually can lead to separation.
It is really important to maintain self-awareness so that we can make a choice of partner with high confidence. Unfortunately we can never be 100% sure that who we choose is completely infallible. Whether or not we are misunderstanding our feelings is matter of how much we trust ourselves rather than our perspective partner. There are a lot more factors to finding a partner and I have definitely only focused on the a rather intimidating topic. Trusting our own decisions and being aware of consequences is very important. No one wants to make a decision they may regret or may simply cause them pain.
